Journey into Grief
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About this ebook
In time, we all become men of sorrow, women of sorrow, people of sorrow. John Claypool echoed this truth in the preface to his book Tracks of a Fellow Struggler, and it is a bitter truth indeed.
In the passing of youth, the loss of love or health, the flight of safety, the death of our beloved—sorrow comes.
This collection of photos, poetry, and memoir presents the words and works with which I expressed my own painful sadness, my rage, and my sense of profound loss when my mother died. I share my experiences in memory of her and in the hope that by joining the company of others who mourn on the printed page, I will find for myself and offer to you some small degree of solace.
". . . this work is inspired! The poetry is beautiful, and coupled with the images, it is wrenchingly emotional . . . Anyone who has lost a mother or a father with whom they shared a special bond, anyone dealing with a devastating loss, will be blessed and comforted by Journey into Grief." —John Earle
About the Author
J.M. Ney-Grimm lives with her husband and children in Virginia, just east of the Blue Ridge Mountains. She enjoys writing poetry and pairing her poems with photos to create echoes between the two. She also writes stories inspired by myth, legend, and fairy tale. She swims for the meditative joy of it, and lifts weights to keep her body strong. The rest of the time she reads Robin McKinley, Diana Wynne Jones, T. Kingfisher, and Lois McMaster Bujold, plays boardgames like Settlers of Catan, rears her twins, and debunks popular myths about food.
Look for her poetry, novels, and memoirs at your favorite bookstore—online or on Main Street.
J.M. Ney-Grimm maintains a blog featuring history, maps, magic, and cultural riches from her fiction, as well as the occasional poem, photo, and other tidbits unearthed by her ever-active curiosity.
J.M. Ney-Grimm
J.M. Ney-Grimm lives with her husband and children in Virginia, just east of the Blue Ridge Mountains. She's learning about permaculture gardening and debunking popular myths about food. The rest of the time she reads Robin McKinley, Diana Wynne Jones, and Lois McMaster Bujold, plays boardgames like Settlers of Catan, rears her twins, and writes stories set in her troll-infested North-lands. Look for her novels and novellas at your favorite bookstore—online or on Main Street.
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Journey into Grief - J.M. Ney-Grimm
In time, we all become men of sorrow, women of sorrow, people of sorrow. John Claypool echoed this truth in the preface to his book Tracks of a Fellow Struggler, and it is a bitter truth indeed.
In the passing of youth, the loss of love or health, the flight of safety, the death of our beloved—sorrow comes.
This collection of photos, poetry, and memoir presents the words and works with which I expressed my own painful sadness, my rage, and my sense of profound loss when my mother died. I share my experiences in memory of Jean Salsbury Ney, in her honor, and in the hope that by joining the company of others who mourn on the printed page, I will find for myself and offer to you some small degree of solace.
". . . this work is inspired! The poetry is beautiful, and coupled with the images, it is wrenchingly emotional . . . Anyone who has lost a mother or a father with whom they shared a special bond, anyone dealing with a devastating loss, will be blessed and comforted by Journey into Grief." —John Earle
by J.M. Ney-Grimm
Journey into Grief. Copyright © 2019 by J.M. Ney-Grimm.
Witness from her Funeral
(previously titled Grievous Loss
October 16, 2017), Grief
(previously titled Bereaved
October 20, 2017), Mourning,
Bereaved
(previously titled Grief
October 25, 2017), Lament,
Missing Her,
One Crossing,
Too Late,
Beacons Unreachable,
Upwelling,
and Beauty in the Close
copyright © 2017 by J.M. Ney-Grimm. First published electronically on JMNey-Grimm.com.
No Beauty,
Exiled,
Despair,
Cold Rage,
Blessed Radiance
(previously titled Bright Radiance
February 15, 2018), Futile Seeking,
Gusty and Fresh,
Risen,
I See Her in Nature,
and Into Memory
(previously titled In Memoriam
May 13, 2018) copyright © 2018 by J.M. Ney-Grimm. First published electronically on JMNey-Grimm.com.
Jeani as a Young Woman
Copyright © 2018 by W. Roger Ney.
Photo used with permission from W. Roger Ney.
Farmor and Farfar
Copyright © 2019 by W. Roger Ney.
Photo used with permission from W. Roger Ney.
Mist,
Dark Branches,
Somberness,
Inner Fire,
Summer Green,
Tangled Garden,
Rosebud,
Crowned,
Bleeding Wounded,
and Stained Glass
copyright © 2017 by J.M. Ney-Grimm.
Cold Lace,
Woodlands,
Faded,
Snow Bed,
Sky Bright,
Mantled Pallor,
Vivid,
Easter Sunlight,
andNarcissus
copyright © 2018 by J.M. Ney-Grimm.
All other photos: Copyright © 2019 by J.M. Ney-Grimm.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
This book is a memoir. It reflects the author’s recollections of her experiences over time. All persons, events, and dialog are drawn from the author’s memory and are not to be construed as strictly accurate. Memory is faulty, after all, and often mistaken.
Book design by J.M. Ney-Grimm
Cover photo: Reflected
by J.M. Ney-Grimm
FIDES PRESS is an imprint of Wild Unicorn Books.
In memoriam
Jean Salsbury Ney
September 24, 1930 — October 7, 2017
Beloved
My Invitation to You
Come with me.
Come take a journey with me.
It is not an easy journey. In fact, it begins in the darkest of all places, the shadow of the valley of death.
So, why should you come, when the beginning is so dark?
Because the journey does not end there.
You have probably already been to the dark place. Someone you love died. Or some piece of yourself that is essential died in you. Someone betrayed you. Someone abandoned you. Or maybe you abandoned you.
There are as many ways to descend into darkness, or be claimed by it, as there are mortals walking this green earth.
But why should you come with me?
And why should you come now?
Because there was something about this book—its cover, its title, its description, or perhaps something unquantifiable—that attracted you, that spoke to you. Some still, small voice within you called or whispered or summoned you.
Come. Come!
Is this a self-help book with questions and exercises and points made?
No. It isn’t.
It’s a sharing of my own journey into grief, the heartbreaking moment of loss, the dark descent, the ocean breakers of feeling, the uneven rise from the depths, the glimpses of light, the instances of relief, and the slow, sure gathering of strength and new life.
So why would you want to experience this?
Because you’ve already been through it yourself. Or because you’re in the middle of such a journey of your own. Or because you fear the journey into grief that lies in your future.
When we take such journeys, we humans, the one thing that enables us to bear