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Invisible Goddess: Step out from the Shadow of Your Divorce and Shine!
Invisible Goddess: Step out from the Shadow of Your Divorce and Shine!
Invisible Goddess: Step out from the Shadow of Your Divorce and Shine!
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Invisible Goddess: Step out from the Shadow of Your Divorce and Shine!

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This book is dedicated to every woman going through divorce or separation, especially if her partner chose to walk out.

Are you ready to transform your breakup into your greatest opportunity and to emerge into a more meaningful life? Desiree Marie Leedo knows that divorce and separation can be some of the greatest gifts you will ever receive, from which you can create a new life aligned with your full potential. In this book she walks you through her process, step-by-step, showing you how to heal and transform every area of your life so as to emerge confidently with the life of your dreams. You can learn how to

establish a daily essential self-care routine for healing and self-nurturing;
take an empowerment audit in each area of your life;
address the painyour rollercoaster of emotions, fears and self-esteem challenges; and
create an inspired new vision for your future and activate the tools for bringing it to fruition.

Using a holistic approach, you can expect real and lasting inner and outer transformation that can shift every area of your lifefor life!

LanguageEnglish
PublisherBalboa Press
Release dateSep 23, 2013
ISBN9781452576442
Invisible Goddess: Step out from the Shadow of Your Divorce and Shine!
Author

Desiree Marie Leedo

Desiree Marie Leedo is a divorce recovery and life empowerment specialist to women, as well as the founder of Invisible Goddess. She draws on a wealth of professional and personal experience and, through her unique six-week process, is dedicated to helping women move from powerless to powerhouse after divorce and separation.

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    Book preview

    Invisible Goddess - Desiree Marie Leedo

    Copyright © Desiree Marie Leedo

    All rights reserved.

    No part of this book may be reproduced by any means, nor transmitted, nor translated into a machine language, without the written permission of the publishers.

    Desiree Marie Leedo has asserted her right to be identified as the author of this work in accordance with sections 77 and 78 of the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.

    Condition of Sale

    This book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, re-sold, hired out or otherwise circulated in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.

    Disclaimer

    Every effort has been made to ensure that the information in this book is accurate and current at the time of publication. The author and the publisher cannot accept responsibility for any misuse or misunderstanding

    of any information contained herein, or any loss, damage or injury, be it health, financial or otherwise, suffered by any individual or group acting upon or relying on information contained herein. None of the opinions or suggestions in this book is intended to replace medical opinion. If you have concerns about your health, please seek professional advice.

    ISBN 9781452576435 (sc)

    ISBN 9781452576459 (hc)

    ISBN 9781452576442 (ebk)

    Contents

    Foreword

    Welcome

    My Journey

    How To Use This Book

    Phase One Foundations For Healing

    Chapter 1 Essential Self–Care

    Phase Two: Rapid Psychological Transformation

    Chapter 2 Making Peace with Yourself

    Chapter 3 The Truth Of What's Emerging

    Chapter 4 Balancing Your Mind And Emotions

    Chapter 5 Facing Your Fears

    Phase Three: Building Your Strongest Life

    Chapter 6 Activating Core Self-Esteem

    Chapter 7 Re-Defining Your Personal Boundaries

    Chapter 8 The New Emerging You

    Chapter 9 Finding Love Again

    Coming Full Circle…

    Acknowledgements

    About The Author

    Further Reading

    Foreword

    There is something that I’ve learned along the way, You can’t really take another to a place you haven’t gone yourself. Desiree creates a brilliant heart opening invitation to healing and thriving to mend the wounds of a broken heart and battered soul. The personal stories remind us we are not alone on this journey. Invisible Goddess is not simply a book about moving beyond the past but creates an epic opening for all of us to create our strongest life and to never settle for anything less than blissful joy. Each phase of this book will create an unprecedented sense of freedom as

    Desiree provides the tools and gifts of gratitude to remove the shackles of a broken heart. Invisible Goddess is a book of our time and of the energy and vibration to heal beyond our individual dilemma and moves us towards brilliance

    beyond our imagination.

    This is an amazing book!

    Dr. Pat Baccili

    (The Award-Winning Dr. Pat Show)

    Owner of Transformation Talk Radio & The Transformation Network

    For my Mom – my best friend

    and my greatest teacher.

    To Chris and Andrew – the men who have supported me through thick and thin; who have shaped and

    continue to shape my life.

    Welcome

    So you’re on your own. There’s no turning back now. It’s over.

    I know that heartache, fear, resentment, grief and a sense of powerlessness are only some of the many emotions you may be experiencing right now and so I welcome you with a warm, virtual embrace.

    I have walked in your shoes and that’s why I am here – to help guide you to awakening those deep, profound areas within that hold the key to unlocking your most meaningful and fulfilled life.

    I know that the journey we are about to take together may be challenging for you at times as you take ownership of healing, transforming and empowering every aspect of your life. But I also know what an incredible woman you are. I know how much strength and creativity you have lying dormant in the depths of your being. I know you have the potential for catalysing this life-changing trauma into the type of outcome that you may yet have dreamed of, but not dared to create.

    You are not alone. Many women have trodden this path on their journey to greatness. This is the path I now lay before you, the path that we now walk together.

    My Journey

    Once upon a time, a vivacious young girl grew up in a beautiful sunny city on the coast of South Africa. She lived a wholesome, happy life and much of what made her so happy was her unshakable self-belief. Life was as an adventure and she took challenges in her stride. She also believed in the power of love and, although she thrived in relationships when she became a young woman, she knew that none of them was that special one that she felt she was destined for.

    In time, this young lady decided to spread her wings as she had always dreamed of travelling the world. She loved engaging with people and she wanted to open herself up to new cultures and new experiences. She saw the world as a giant playground, a place in which one could learn and grow and she couldn’t wait to sink her teeth into all that life had to offer.

    It was on her travels that she met the one she felt destined to spend the rest of her days with. It was love at first sight and they both knew it. They were soon engaged and married not long after. People that saw them together often commented that theirs was the type of love only found in fairytales. As he was from England, they decided to return for a visit before settling down to a life together on the warm coastal shores back in her home country.

    But within a week he was offered a lucrative job with his old company in the vibrant city of London. Our heroine was excited at the prospect of building a new life and a new career in the capital so she postponed the idea of life together on the sunny shores where she had grown up and she consented. She threw herself wholeheartedly into this new experience, embracing the cultural diversity and the challenge of corporate life in the steel towers of some of the most lucrative companies in the world.

    She met many fascinating people, with one introduction leading to the next until, eventually, through a series of serendipitous coincidences, she discovered a natural affinity and a deep passion for philosophy, healing and metaphysics. The spark was ignited and, being entrepreneurial by nature, it wasn’t long before she decided to pursue a career in complementary medicine. She approached this new venture with a great deal of zest and spent the next few years entrenched in a series of complex courses of study with some of the most renowned teachers and authors from around the world in this field. She felt ‘on purpose’ and life was good!

    But then one day, out of the blue, her husband returned from work and announced that he had been offered a promotion. They would be re-locating to a city called Aberdeen in the Scottish Highlands. A part of her felt unsure about what life would be like on this cold, distant and unfamiliar shore but another part was keen to carve out a new career with all her studies and case studies now firmly behind her. And so she consented.

    But life in Aberdeen turned out to be isolating. As a foreigner, she found it hard to break into the tight traditional social circles of the local community and so could not attract the clientele she had hoped. Her husband worked long hours away from home and she often found the solitude overbearing. In an attempt to help, he bought her a sweet little kitten for company. It pacified her for a month or two but kittens don’t speak and our heroine loved interacting. She soon felt deflated again. The months rolled by painfully slowly and the days and weeks blurred into one another.

    Then one day, quite suddenly, a light appeared at the end of the tunnel. Her husband was offered another promotion that would move them to the cosmopolitan city of Edinburgh. When she saw the beauty that graced this city and felt the warmth of the people, she lit up again and hope returned to her heart. She was pleased for the progress he was making at work and perhaps now, finally, she could get on with her dream of building her own business.

    She certainly did. In fact, overnight, she became a success and it wasn’t long before her practice was booked weeks in advance. At times she could barely believe she was being paid so well for doing what she loved. The reward of watching the lives of her clients transform spurred her on to ever-greater heights. Life was good again and she felt fulfilled. She made many wonderful and interesting friends. Her husband was also doing well and the years that followed moved them both from one good thing to another. Life seemed close to perfect and she could almost hear the pitter-patter of tiny feet as she thought about this next chapter in their lives.

    But her husband was beginning to fly high in his career. After only a few years he was suddenly and unexpectedly offered a major promotion back in London. He would be returning to the city now at the top of his game. Our heroine felt bewildered at the news. She spent days pondering the disruption this would bring to her life, her career and the circle of friends she had created. She had now built up a reputation of her own and was climbing her own ladder of success. She looked around at everything they had built together - their beautiful home, their successful careers, their wonderful friends, their dream life - and she couldn’t really believe she was deciding about whether or not to leave it all behind. She wanted to support her husband’s career as she had always done but she couldn’t seem to escape the burning question that kept gnawing away at her on the inside - What about what matters to me? She could not have known then that the sacrifice she was about to make, at this very crossroads, would set her on a path of great despair for many, many years to come.

    Our heroine dutifully reasoned that they both needed to be happy in their careers. And he had promised faithfully to support the start-up of her business in London in every way that he could. And so, once again, she consented.

    They purchased a new home on the outskirts of London and rented a property while it was being completed. But she began to feel isolated again. She didn’t know a soul and she felt impatient that the completion date for their new home was continually being postponed. That dull feeling of depression she had first experienced in Aberdeen slowly returned as she felt more and more out of sync with each passing day. As the months passed, she began to notice how distant her husband of ten years had become.

    She made more of an effort to get closer and communicate with him but he pulled away, becoming a closed book. Then, a month before they were due to move into their new home, he encouraged her to visit her family back in South Africa to attend her dad’s birthday, but on her own. This was totally out of character for him. Tired and exasperated, she took the next flight.

    Seeing her family was exactly what she needed and the sunshine really lifted her spirits. But a week into her visit, after unfamiliarly sparse communication with her husband, he called one day to tell her that he wanted to end their marriage. She didn’t think she had heard him properly so she asked him to repeat it. He did. She was speechless. Devastated. She tried to respond but nothing came out of her mouth. In that moment, she felt the bottom of her world and her stomach fall out beneath her. The silence became deafening. It was as if the earth suddenly stopped turning as she watched her dreams shatter into pieces in slow motion in the same family home in which they were dreamed into existence. She jumped with a start as the teacup she had been holding smashed to the floor, snapping her back to the reality of the moment. She didn’t understand. He couldn’t explain. She hung up the phone and spent the rest of the day in bed, in a state of shock, with the covers pulled securely over her head while her family tried, in vain, to console her.

    The next few weeks were a blur. She returned to England and attempted to get to the bottom of what had happened. She moved into their new house on her own, her husband adamantly refusing to join her. Still, he could give her no legitimate reason why he wanted to end their marriage, other than that he didn’t want to be married any more. Soon enough though, she discovered that he had met someone else and, although he denied an affair, somehow this new female friend, a psychology student, had confirmed his suspicion that he was not living a fulfilled life within the confines of his marriage. The days dragged on ad infinitum, with her begging for them to attend counselling. He began legal separation proceedings instead. It was over. He was gone. She wondered how they had got here. What had been the turning point? When had the love of her life, turned into this stranger she barely recognised?

    She was forced to put their new house on the market and, slowly the finality of her situation began to dawn on her. She had lost everything. A thick black fog descended on her and became her new companion in this strange city. It was an icy February in England that year, she had nobody to talk to other than her family over the phone, thousands of miles away, and she felt completely alone. This was her first real taste of disempowerment. She had failed. She had traded her business, her home, her friends and her lifestyle for the progression of her husband’s career, affording him the fulfilment he so craved, and it had cost her everything.

    Although our heroine felt paralysed, locking herself away in the weeks that followed, all was not quite lost. One day, she noticed a coffee shop near her local supermarket and decided to go in. She saw the headline on a magazine cover that questioned whether or not self-help books were truly effective in times of crisis and she was suddenly reminded of who she was. She went to the nearest bookstore and purchased as many self-help books on divorce, separation, relationships and self-esteem as she could lay her hands on, promising herself that she would not stop until she found a solution that worked for her - a way to formulate a plan for moving herself out of her state of despair and disempowerment.

    She read and read and read, day after day, night after night. But the solution eluded her.

    One might think the story ends there - that finally, after selling the home and splitting the assets, she found a way to confront her fears, take up the lesson, empower her life and move forward. But, unbeknown to our heroine, she had not yet hit rock bottom. There was one more devastating twist she would take on this difficult path in her life’s journey. One more crucial mistake she would still make before she found her way. And this would serve up even greater despair than she had experienced thus far.

    She met a man a couple of months later, a seemingly charming and loving man. Although she felt nowhere near ready to trust in love again, he was patient and extremely nurturing towards her and so she let him in. A strong bond seemed to be forming between them and she breathed in the promise of new love, giving him her trust. She started her business again and things began to improve.

    But a couple of months into the relationship, he suddenly became ill. Seriously ill. He developed the type of illness that threatens to take one’s life. His family, who lived in Europe and enjoyed extreme wealth, begged her to give up her business and take care of him, as they were so concerned for his life. They promised full support until his recovery and, beyond that, they promised further support for getting her business back on track again.

    Another huge crossroads. She felt sick to her stomach. There was so much at stake. She had only just begun getting her life and her career on track and she felt protective of it. But his life was at risk and he had supported her in her own healing process. How could she refuse when he so desperately needed her? So she turned her back on the intuitive voice that told her to walk away, shook hands with reason and consented.

    She spent the next two years caring for him at home between a series of hospital visits, nursing him back to health and dealing with the many setbacks in ways that she never imagined she had it within her to do. And at first, she tried to keep her business going alongside the chaos of what soon became everyday life. She felt stressed and exhausted beyond respite. It also took more and more energy to drown out that nagging voice inside that kept telling her to get out.

    And then he made a recovery. She felt victorious! They had beaten the odds. Feeling inspired, she turned her focus back to her career and began the task of getting her life back on track, now relying on his family’s promise.

    But hope was short lived and after only a few weeks his health took a downturn once again. His family, for reasons of their own and completely unexpected, no longer found it convenient for her to live there and asked her to move out. She was numb with shock and utter disbelief. Not long after that, he ended their relationship, not even returning her remaining possessions.

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