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Reflections on Life's Challenges

Reflections on Life's Challenges

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Reflections on Life's Challenges

230 pagine
3 ore
Oct 14, 2008


Reflections on Lifes Challenges

For many of us, life is a tough and lonely road to journey on. At times, we seem to be struggling for a sense of direction and find it extremely difficult to decide on what path to take on the road to personal happiness and success.

The things that are happening in our daily lives seem to be overwhelming us to the point that sometimes we do not know what to do, who to turn to or where to run to, so as to solve our challenges. Our goal is of course personal happiness, and emotional and physical survival, which at times seems to be always just over the horizon.

There are many successes and challenges taking place in our lives, which work to affect us in a major fashion, whether it is in a positive or negative way. What this book attempts to do is to reflect on some of these issues and put them in context for you the reader.

In doing so, my sincere desire is for you to analyze what is happening in your life and help develop the aptitude to live the life that God has created you to live.

Laurence Carter

Oct 14, 2008

Informazioni sull'autore

  Laurence Carter has spent almost thirteen years in the airline industry. He changed careers and commenced teaching, and has been doing so for the past six years. He has taught a wide variety of subjects. Some of the areas in which he has lectured include Tourism Development, Marketing, Business Management, and Event Planning.   He has used his work experiences and management training obtained from the University of the West Indies, to develop his teaching career. He has concentrated on training in Event Management, and has done so successfully in several Caribbean Islands.   His research interests encompass, Event Management, Sustainable Tourism, Tourism Development, Marketing and Business Management. He has been an independent consultant for several years. He thinks it is important that individuals, with academic and practical knowledge, should make an effort to write and publish books on their area of expertise.   He has always wanted to write, and this book should be the first in a series of academic and fictional books that he hopes to publish in the next few years.   Laurence Carter

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Reflections on Life's Challenges - Laurence Carter

Reflections on Life’s



Laurence Carter


1663 Liberty Drive, Suite 200

Bloomington, IN 47403

Phone: 1-800-839-8640

© 2008 Laurence Carter. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

First published by AuthorHouse 10/8/2008

ISBN: 978-1-4389-2205-8 (e)

ISBN: 978-1-4389-2204-1 (sc)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2008909309

Bloomington, Indiana



Money, People and Knowledge

The Early Years


Relationships and choice

The ‘Money Game’

Legitimate ways of getting money

Illegitimate ways of getting money

Now you have it, what will you do with it?

The advantages and the ‘Pitfalls’ of the Money game

Can you really get everything you want from money?

‘The People Game’ using people to get ahead

The Advantages and the Pitfalls

The Knowledge game – The Power of Knowledge

The Advantages and the Pitfalls of depending on Knowledge for success

Can we really separate the three?

Making the right choices for you

Building Self belief and Self Confidence


Fear and Faith

‘‘A Personality for the New Age’

Sexual relationships

True Friendship and True Love



Problems that you can control

Problems we cannot control

How to make Decisions

The Importance of Balance

Managing Change

Our Emotions

Our Perceptions

Our Culture

Managing Change


Stress Management

Discipline and Priorities

The List

Personal Development

Personal and Interpersonal Effectiveness

Stay Virtuous and Live Right








Letting go and starting over

Living Life to the Fullest

Getting out of the way of myself?

Being Single

Oh Please! Tell the truth….

The Feminizing of Men



Experiences in my personal and professional existence have allowed me to interact with individuals from all walks of life. Teaching has allowed me to broaden my knowledge as to how individuals live on a daily basis as they try to conquer the varying challenges that impact their lives. I have worked as a recruiter, and this has allowed me to meet teenagers and adults when they were they can possibly at their most vulnerable, needing a job.

My conversations and interaction with them have been enlightening and made one realize how difficult life can be especially when you are not working. I have also embarked on Leadership Development Training which has allowed me to gain insights into how individuals react and respond to the challenges that they face at work and to identify what needs to be done to help them develop their Leadership skills.

The one thing that has always struck me about many of the people I have met is that, whether they are young, old, male or female, financially struggling or rich, whatever junction they are at in their life; many of them seem to be in a constant struggle to find some sense of purpose and peace in their lives. There always seems to be a situation where a person, group of persons or a problem of some magnitude, is impacting adversely on their life. This has them on a quest, to find a way out of the challenges that they face.

What stands out is that many individuals seem to have a hard time finding a sense of direction. The difficulty at times comes in trying to decide, what path needs to be taken to succeed with their personal goals. It is also hard, in the sense that the things that are happening around them seem to be so overwhelming, to the point that they do not know where to turn too next and can easily become disillusioned. There are also distractions which at times seem to capture all of an individual’s free time, to the extent that it becomes difficult for them to concentrate on their primary objectives, if they can figure out what they are in the first place.

We at times wish we could find ways to escape all our problems and challenges for a time, if not permanently. A simple change for many of us would suffice as long as it consists of a distinct alteration from our present routine. Excitement, adventure, and fulfillment of fantasies will be the goal, so as to take your mind away from life’s issues for a while. Some of us go so far as to live in our own fantasy world to help us cope, as our financial position and responsibilities may not allow us the ability to satisfy our desires for excitement and change.

Escape in itself is just a temporary fix, whether real or imagined. The real issues that are affecting individuals are many times not being addressed, and many of us will continue to meander through our present existence, without proper guidance as to how to deal with life’s circumstances. However, there are some of us, who are able to recognise what problems confront us and are willing and ready to find solutions, rather than seeking a way to run away from the challenges.

Many of us know what we want but it is the process of doing the actions that are required to get us what we want and where we want, which prove to be a major hindrance. There are so many things that seem to be going on in our lives that are tugging us in so many different directions. For many, this proves to be a roadblock from achieving life goals. Worse of all, many of these distractions are inflicted on us from the outside world, from those that are around us and the situations that we tend to find ourselves in.

I have had many challenges myself, over the past few years. I have experienced some setbacks, which have made me pause to think and reflect on my life and to contemplate why is there a need to pursue the things that man has placed such a high value on. We are socialised to believe that there are so many things that we must have, and should do, so as to be able to show the world that we have achieved something in our lives. The pursuit of these man-made goals is something we try to justify by referring to the customs that have been grilled into us, from a young age. We must have certain trappings to show as monuments to our success in this life. We worry about the pursuit of these goals, rather than other worthwhile endeavors that can have some meaning in our lives.

I have spent time analyzing different situations and I have come to reflect about some of the issues that have affected me and these are some of the same challenges that affect others. I feel I should share my thoughts with everyone, with the hope that it can be of help. I also want to pass on the realization that there is more to life than running after earthly possessions and worldly comforts.

They only appease for a time as personal and professional triumphs never seem to sate an individual’s thirst for possessions and status; if anything it just makes the quest more intense and locks us in a tight circle where we never seem to achieve enough and that lofty goal always seems just over the horizon.

I express my point of view and in doing so I do hope that you take into consideration what I have to say and use it to think and reflect on some of what is now happening in your life or on past events that may have impacted on your existence.

I acknowledge the assistance of my wife Marthalin in my efforts to publish this book. She has worked patiently with me to plan, design and edit this book. She is also responsible for the cover design. She is an inspiration to me and I am blessed by her support in my efforts to publish this my second book.

Laurence Carter

Money, People and Knowledge

‘A look at how we get ahead in life’

I do not believe it is unrealistic to assume that we all want to get ahead and achieve success in life. However you have to ask the question; what is success? What measure will we use to decide that we have made some significant achievement or contribution to our lives, or the lives of those around us?

Very often our reference points to success reflect the socialization we have received as to what we must attain to be able to say that we have done something of worth either for ourselves our for the individuals or groups we interact with. We are taught from early that we must for example; accumulate the trappings of wealth, a house, a car etc… as signs of success. In some circumstances, success is more reflected in job achievements, with the appropriate pay levels being attained by an individual. It can also be measured in terms of artistic or academic achievements, which can lead to public recognition, fame and adoration.

For some, who have little education and resources, success has to be measured in simpler terms such as basic survival. It must be understood that the despair that envelops some of our lives makes everything seem so hopeless at times, and as a consequence the focus is just on day to day survival. I however think that we still dream of a better life. In the recesses of our mind we still feel that we can pull everything around and make it all better. Hope is something that drives many of us to aspire to better things in life.

Our life goals are very much defined by the environment that we grow up in and what we see as the ultimate achievement that we want to aspire to. It is also driven by the necessities that exist in our present circumstances; the influence that this is having on our decision making processes and on the things that we choose to make priorities out of in our lives.

Yet for some of us, the driving force behind our activity is that we want to be known for something of consequence. For some of us that something that we excel at, will define who we are in the sight of others and give personal meaning to an individual’s life. Success in achieving the goals that are set out will be used to define whether we have gotten ahead or achieved anything out of our endeavors.

It must also be acknowledged that some of us have no such lofty goals and are incapable of conceptualizing any such ideas. One of the disturbing aspects of modern society is that as much as it is that a greater proportion of our society has access to advanced education, at the same time many individuals, especially males are not utilizing the opportunities that are available to them and endeavoring to develop their intellect. In short, we are developing a generation of people who are just not interested in making a valuable contribution in many aspects of modern life; their sole purpose it seems is to enjoy themselves and continue to procreate.

For many, life’s existence is simply revolving around surviving and making themselves as happy and content as possible. While that also requires goal centred activity, lack of education, limited means and the many other challenges that take up the daily lives of people, make it impossible for many to think beyond surviving from day to day. They are stuck in that chasm and they do not aspire to loftier goals which can see them contributing to the development of the society in which they exist, and personally excelling in their own lives.

It is sad to realise that many in the world live this form of existence. Yet in the back of your mind you know that, the human spirit being what it is still works in a way to allow them to find some form of happiness in the midst of the general drift that characterizes there daily lives.

Even in these circumstances, people still dream. They still aspire to the thing that they consider will bring them ultimate happiness. This makes you get up every day and try one more time – and as some would say ‘to try a thing’, as you work to meet your aspirations. Life is a struggle to survive and mankind has shown the resilience to make it day after day in the face of the challenges that make up our lives. We are a strong people even if at times misguided in our efforts to prosper.

How you achieve your aspirations ultimately leads you to a choice of strategy to achieve these goals. Every society, every individual believes that certain paths must be taken to achieve life goals; it is part of the social trappings of every society. As a consequence, as you grow through to adulthood, you are socialized to accept that certain attainments and symbols are the hallmarks of those who are making something out of their lives.

You are sent to school to get an education, which is to form a base for you to achieve life’s objectives. Not everyone however, gets the chance to educate themselves or for that matter, manage to stay in the school system to gain the knowledge they need. They may opt for other paths to get what they want, either legitimately or by other means.

Lets face it however, a school’s role goes beyond ‘book education’ and extends to learning morals and other life values and goals which all go to helping to reinforce those things that we consider as critical to success in life. A school however also serves as a giant day nursery for children while adults work. Most importantly it is suppose to stream line the thought processes of whole generations so as to make them ready for the work place and the other roles of their adult life, which they are expected to embark on when they leave school.

Invariably the strategy to achieve is based on excelling in any of three areas – the pursuit of Money, using other People to achieve your goals and accumulation of Knowledge.

Money for many is seen as the panacea for all ills and everyone spends much of their time figuring out how to hold on to the money they have, and how to make more money to get them all the things they want out of life.

Second, as you are part of a network of people that interact with you at work and in other spheres of life, there is the idea of excelling at using other People to achieve your goals. We use other individuals, to help us attain our goals, and this can go a long way in influencing the level of success or lack of success that pervades our existence.

Finally there is the idea that accumulation of Knowledge can be used to achieve your objectives. This is where education comes into importance, or it can be in a simpler form, such as the manipulation of critical information that helps you build a base to achieve the objective that you set out for yourself.

Success for many means being good in at least one of these areas and using your abilities, whether natural or learned; in that area to get what you want. Fulfillment, for many, comes from being really good at what you do in the area that works best for you as an individual. You then strive to become good at playing the game, (the ‘Money Game’, the ‘People game’ or the "Knowledge Game’) and using it to get ahead.

For some, they become proficient at more than one area and some are good at all three. When you reflect and examine your life, you will see that in your younger years you decide whether consciously or not, to excel in one or more of these areas and use it as a base to get ahead in life.

The Early Years

So much of what happens in life is shaped by decisions made when you are young. Especially in the teenage years going into your early twenties, where you are now starting to shape the path that you will take through life. Everyone is trying to tell you what to do. The problem with this is that they are trying to tell you what to do, but the window from which they are peering at the world is their own and in many cases does not reflect the way that you perceive what is going on around you.

One of the things that individuals find difficult to do is to have empathy. They cannot put themselves in someone else’s shoes, but they are full of advice about situations, but from their own perspective of life. You should become a doctor, lawyer, or accountant, study and go to university to get particular qualifications. Some insist you look for a job in government, or any job that is safe in terms of its ability to give continuous and guaranteed employment. Safe means that it is in an environment where changes in the economy will not significantly affect the status of your job. Or the legal status of the job makes you

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