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    Online Dating for Men: The Basics: Dating for Men, #1
    Online Dating for Men: The Basics: Dating for Men, #1
    Online Dating for Men: The Basics: Dating for Men, #1
    Ebook90 pages1 hour

    Online Dating for Men: The Basics: Dating for Men, #1

    By Cassie Leigh

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    About this ebook

    Online dating can be a real challenge. And if you're new to it it can seem absolutely overwhelming. Which site do you use? What do you say in a profile? Is it okay to send each woman the same introductory message? What do you do when a woman actually responds?

    This book covers all of that and more. So if you're an online dating newbie or just not getting anywhere with it, check it out.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherCassie Leigh
    Release dateFeb 14, 2015
    ISBN9781507017623
    Online Dating for Men: The Basics: Dating for Men, #1

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      Book preview

      Online Dating for Men - Cassie Leigh

      What Is Your Goal?

      The first thing you have to do before anything else is determine why you're doing this. Because your reasons for online dating are going to drive every other choice you make. This is just for you. Tell your friends or mom whatever you want, but be honest with yourself. Because what you want will drive everything from your user name to the site you use to who you choose to communicate with.

      Are you looking for lasting love or just trying to find someone to hook up with for a little fun?

      If you're just looking for a good time, this whole online dating thing is going to be much, much simpler for you than it is for the person trying to find the one. Not as easy as it is for a woman looking for sex, obviously, but it's still easier to find someone for a night than to find someone for a lifetime, yes?

      If you want sex, you're willing to be open about it, willing to choose sites geared towards that sort of thing, and willing to hustle enough to get to yes, you'll find it.

      For a one night stand, you basically need someone willing to do what you want to do who doesn't repulse you so much you don't want to do it anymore. For a lifetime love you need someone you're going to like no matter what shit goes down. Lost jobs, cross-country moves, illness, weight gain, depression, aging, dogs, kids, vacations, etc., etc.

      Yeah. Pretty easy to see that the standard for one night is a lot less than the standard for a lifetime.

      Now, I'm not saying you're going to end up with some hottie. If you want good looks AND sex, well, that's a much harder goal. Especially if you aren't amazingly good-looking yourself. I mean honestly, let's think this one through for a second.

      Figure for every ten guys looking to just get some tonight there are two women who want the same thing. That means that each woman gets to choose from at least five possible choices, which means that you have to offer more than those other four guys. Not the time to be shooting for the stars. Let all the other guys aim for that one really hot chick who wants something casual, while you aim a little lower and actually end up with someone tonight.

      Just a thought.

      Of course, as someone who always advocates at least trying for the best you can get, that's a bit painful to write. You never know when that perfect ten will say yes, so might as well try.

      BUT. This is online dating and so many men think that way it can get pretty painful pretty fast. I am by no means a ten, but I get enough of those might as well try messages on some of the sites to almost drive me away from online dating altogether.

      So let's do this: Let's say that you will get to yes much faster if you're realistic about what you can offer and aim accordingly.

      Enough of that digression. Back to the point.

      If you just want sex with someone around your age and willing, it's pretty easy. Be honest about it and find the sites or apps that are known for that sort of thing and then work it until you get a yes. (There's a reason good salesmen usually do well with the ladies.)

      If you want lifelong happiness with one special person, it's going to be much more challenging. Not impossible, just challenging.

      Online dating is still dating. And a lot of the issues that kept you from finding a partner in the real world are going to keep you from finding someone online, too. But at least with online dating you can see a much larger pool of potential mates and you get to do it at home in your pajamas or when you're standing in the checkout line at the grocery store.

      If you're looking for something serious, don't get discouraged. You can find a life partner through online dating. I have multiple friends who are happily married to people they met online.

      Just know that finding that special person to spend the rest of your life with will be far more challenging than finding someone to spend a night with.

      The men who are most successful at online dating are the ones who are persistent and don’t let a few bad dates or non-responses get them down. And who maintain a positive attitude when interacting with potential matches.

      Honestly, if you're looking for someone truly amazing and special and you haven't exhausted the friend-of-a-friend referrals and haven't yet approached that cute girl you see every week at rock climbing, I'd suggest doing that first before you wade into online dating. But if you've exhausted all your real world possibilities or like the idea of getting to peruse a woman's info before you take the next step, then online dating it is.

      Okay, so back to the main point of the chapter:

      Why are you online dating? What do you want?

      Sex?

      Friendship?

      A fuck buddy?

      A steady Friday night date that doesn't care who your Saturday night is spent with?

      A long-term, but not marriage-minded, committed relationship?

      Marriage?

      Marriage and babies?

      You can find any of the above. You just have to approach it the right way.

      Step one is being honest with yourself about what you want.

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