Everand Logo

Welcome to Everand!

  • Discover millions of ebooks, audiobooks, and so much more with a free trial

    Only $11.99/month after trial. Cancel anytime.

    Golfing Stories
    Golfing Stories
    Golfing Stories
    Ebook181 pages42 minutes

    Golfing Stories

    By Christopher Bruce

    ()

    Read preview

    About this ebook

    Many years ago in Scotland , a new game was invented. It was ruled to be for 'Gentlemen Only-Ladies Forbidden' and thus, the word GOLF entered into the English language. That is what I am told but I'm not able to verify it. This collection of golfing jokes and cartoons has been compiled from those sent to me by friends from around the world and my sole function has been to edit them. Many of the jokes have been around for decades and tend to reappear in one or another revamped form on the internet and in magazines and newspapers from time to time. Wherever a joke is known to have been told by a particular person the joke is attributed to that person but in most instances this is not the case. All but three of the illustrations found in the Plain Family Fun are by Kitti Meeboonnum and Wirat Sukcharoen. Golfing Stories was compiled with a view to providing readers with a modicum of amusement during those sometimes not so quiet moments in the toilet, wc, loo, lav, lavatory, gents, ladies or thunderbox as it was sometimes called in the good old days and where it is just not possible to wield a putter. I trust that you will take it with you to one of the few places where it is not commonplace to be able to take your computer (even if it is a laptop), and wish you many hours of amusement in that most private of places. To those of you purchasing this collection I wish you an hour or three of great amusement.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherChristopher Bruce
    Release dateApr 30, 2013
    ISBN9781301127375
    Golfing Stories
    Author

    Christopher Bruce

    Chris Bruce was born in England and educated in South Africa. After a long career in the construction industry in South Africa, Namibia, Hong Kong and the Philippines, Chris moved to Thailand in 2001. He built and equipped a sausage factory in Bangkok which was operated by his wife. Not being Thai, unable to speak the language, no longer a part of the construction “EXPAT NETWORK” due to the slump in the Asian construction industry, it was not long before he became somewhat bored with life. One way to alleviate the boredom was to write. Chris decided to use his knowledge of the sausage industry to write a book of sausage recipes. This was followed by a book of recipes for preparing meals using sausage and a book of liqueur making methods and recipes. After completing the three recipe books he encouraged friends from around the world to send him jokes and cartoons by email. This series of TAKE ME TO THE TOILET BOOKS (VOLS I to VII) is the result of the huge response he got. Chris makes no claim to have dreamt up the jokes, anecdotes and other amusing facts or stories featured in these volumes and in fact it is impossible, with very few exceptions, to say where the jokes originated. Two Thai cartoonists Kitti Meeboonnum and Wirat Sukcharoen provided the illustrations. One thing Chris did realize was that people do not have much time to read a little humour and the “Thunderbox”, as it used to be called, is the ideal place to do so. The internet, the source of much modern humor, is not normally accessible during visits to this most private of places and it is hoped that these “TOILET COMPANIONS” will add amusement to the otherwise idle moments spent in the “BOX”.

    Read more from Christopher Bruce

    Related to Golfing Stories

    Related ebooks

    Comics & Graphic Novels For You

    View More
    View More

    Related podcast episodes

    Related articles

    • Article

      Quick & DELICIOUS

      Nov 4, 2021

      Quick & DELICIOUS
      2 min read

    • Article

      By The Dozen!

      Mar 24, 2023

      By The Dozen!
      4 min read

    • Article

      Pork Cordon Bleu

      Nov 5, 2019

      Pork Cordon Bleu
      3 min read

    • Article

      My Favourite Things

      Nov 22, 2019

      My Favourite Things
      5 min read

    • Article

      Tasty & Filling

      Oct 21, 2019

      Tasty & Filling
      5 min read

    • Article

      Love Your Leftovers

      Dec 30, 2021

      Love Your Leftovers
      2 min read

    • Article

      Pig Out!

      Jan 20, 2020

      Pig Out!
      5 min read

    • Article

      Game Cookery

      Mar 29, 2023

      Game Cookery
      3 min read

    • Article

      Muffin Compares To You

      May 10, 2023

      Muffin Compares To You
      1 min read

    • Article

      What Would Prue Do?

      Mar 23, 2020

      What Would Prue Do?
      5 min read

    • Article

      Leftover Lovers

      Nov 13, 2021

      Leftover Lovers
      6 min read

    • Article

      Come, Let’s (skottel) Braai

      Dec 17, 2019

      Come, Let’s (skottel) Braai
      6 min read

    • Article

      Get It Right Cheeseburger

      Mar 20, 2020

      After members of the Olive team had a near religious experience trying the out-of-this-world cheeseburger served up at the Four Legs pop-up at the Compton Arms, Islington, I was tasked with the challenge of creating my own version of the perfect chee

      2 min read

    • Article

      In Season Vege Mushroom

      Oct 27, 2019

      In Season Vege Mushroom
      5 min read

    • Article

      Host For The HOLIDAYS

      Dec 7, 2023

      Host For The HOLIDAYS
      8 min read

    • Article

      Fantastic Feta

      Aug 26, 2021

      Fantastic Feta
      5 min read

    • Article

      Take 5

      Jan 27, 2023

      Take 5
      5 min read

    • Article

      By The Dozen!

      Mar 24, 2023

      By The Dozen!
      5 min read

    • Article

      The Upper Crust

      Apr 29, 2019

      The Upper Crust
      7 min read

    • Article

      The Kitchen Goddess

      Aug 26, 2019

      The Kitchen Goddess
      5 min read

    • Article

      Brunch Burgers

      Mar 8, 2022

      Brunch Burgers
      3 min read

    • Article

      Low-cal Dinners

      Jun 21, 2022

      Low-cal Dinners
      6 min read

    • Article

      GOING COLD turkey

      Nov 26, 2020

      GOING COLD turkey
      3 min read

    • Article

      Yes, Chef!

      Nov 12, 2021

      Yes, Chef!
      9 min read

    • Article

      A Tour De Wors

      Feb 17, 2020

      A Tour De Wors
      4 min read

    • Article

      Salad Season Starts Now

      Jan 12, 2021

      Salad Season Starts Now
      2 min read

    • Article

      BREAK An Egg

      Sep 9, 2018

      BREAK An Egg
      3 min read

    • Article

      Chicken Noodle Casserole

      May 5, 2020

      Chicken Noodle Casserole
      3 min read

    Related categories

    Reviews for Golfing Stories

    0 ratings

    0 ratings0 reviews

    What did you think?

    Tap to rate

    Review must be at least 10 words

      Book preview

      Golfing Stories - Christopher Bruce

      VERSATILE SAUSAGE

      Sausage is a far more versatile food than is generally recognized. Whether eaten on a skewer in Bangkok’s streets, dished up fried or boiled, served with bacon and eggs for breakfast in homes or hotels all over the world, or bar-b-qued on plush patios or building sites, sausage is great as a hors d’oeuvre, a main course, in crepes, with pasta, noodles or dumplings or in soups, stews and casseroles. Regardless of where or when it is served, sausage makes a versatile, simple to prepare and very satisfying meal in any shape or form.

      The recipes included in this book have been kept simple. The preparation of meals using these sausage recipes does not require equipment any more complicated than will be found in any Asian or Western kitchen. You will be able to prepare meals from the recipes in this book which are both nutritious and delicious using local sausages and readily available vegetables, herbs, spices and other ingredients.

      You will notice that we do not specify a particular kind of sausage for most of the recipes. The reason for this is that virtually any locally produced beef, chicken, lamb, pork, poultry or seafood sausage can be used. The only exceptions are those recipes which require a particular condiment to accompany them e.g. apple sauce with pork sausage or mint sauce with lamb sausage.

      Where recipes call for separately prepared ingredients, such as crepe, pancake, pie crust and dough mixes, these are provided under the heading of Crepe, Pancake and Dough Mixes.

      Back to Contents

      SAUSAGE WITH EGGS

      SAUSAGE WITH SCRAMBLED EGGS

      Method:

      • Sauté sausage in a pan until brown. Remove from heat, drain off most of the liquid and set aside.

      • Combine all the remaining ingredients in a bowl and mix thoroughly.

      • Place the pan with the sausage over medium heat, pour the egg mixture over the sausage and keep stirring until the mixture is set.

      • Serve hot.

      Serves 4

      Back to Contents

      SAUSAGE WITH CHEESE AND EGGS

      Method:

      • Heat oil in pan over medium heat, add sausage slices and cook until tender.

      • Combine milk and eggs in bowl and add to sausage in pan.

      • Fold sausage into milk/egg mixture while cooking.

      • Layer cheese on top of cooked mixture and leave until melted.

      • Serve hot for breakfast.

      Serves 4

      Note: Can be served as a main meal with vegetables added.

      Back to Contents

      SAUSAGE WITH CHICKEN LIVER AND EGGS

      Method:

      • Place sausage in pan and sauté until browned, remove from pan using slotted spoon and set aside. Discard fat.

      • Add butter and chicken livers to pan and sauté for 5 minutes.

      • Return the sausage to the pan, add the remaining ingredients and stir over medium heat until the eggs scramble.

      • Spoon onto dish and serve.

      Serves 4

      Back to Contents

      SAUSAGE IN OMELETTE WITH ONIONS I

      Method:

      • Sauté the sausage in a pan until brown and cut into 10mm slices.

      • Discard the fat.

      • Place the onion in a pan with the vegetable oil and sauté until tender.

      • Place all the eggs, parsley, salt and pepper in a bowl, beat thoroughly and pour mixture into the pan with the onions.

      • Cook the omelet over medium heat and when almost ready add the sausage slices to one side and fold the other side over.

      • Slide the omelet onto dish, slice into 2 pieces and serve im- mediately.

      Serves 2

      Enjoying the preview?
      Page 1 of 1