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    My Life as Reindeer Road Kill
    My Life as Reindeer Road Kill
    My Life as Reindeer Road Kill
    Ebook98 pages1 hour

    My Life as Reindeer Road Kill

    By Bill Myers

    4.5/5

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    About this ebook

    This hilarious chapter book for 8 to 12-year-olds from the Wally McDoogle series shows tweens the true meaning of Christmas. Santa on an out-of-control four-wheeler? Electrical Rudolph on the rampage? Nothing unusual, just Wally McDoogle doing some last-minute Christmas shopping. . . for God! In this nonstop, action-packed novel, Wally receives an invitation to Jesus’ birthday party and bungles his way to understanding the best gift to give God.

    My Life as Reindeer Road Kill

    • features boy blunder Wally McDoogle in his signature confusion, chaos, and comedy
    • teaches biblical values and character-building lessons with action and humor that appeal to middle schoolers
    • comes in a small lightweight softcover perfect for stashing in a backpack or in a car pocket

    My Life as Reindeer Road Kill will keep young readers laughing while learning about generosity and what God really wants.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherThomas Nelson
    Release dateSep 28, 1995
    ISBN9781418567002
    My Life as Reindeer Road Kill
    Author

    Bill Myers

    Bill Myers (www.Billmyers.com) is a bestselling author and award-winning writer/director whose work has won sixty national and international awards. His books and videos have sold eight million copies and include The Seeing, Eli, The Voice, My Life as, Forbidden Doors, and McGee and Me.

    Read more from Bill Myers

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      Book preview

      My Life as Reindeer Road Kill - Bill Myers

      MY LiFe

      as

      Reindeer Road Kill

      Tommy Nelson® Books by Bill Myers

      The Incredible Worlds of Wally McDoogle

      —My Life As a Smashed Burrito with Extra Hot Sauce

      —My Life As Alien Monster Bait

      —My Life As a Broken Bungee Cord

      —My Life As Crocodile Junk Food

      —My Life As Dinosaur Dental Floss

      —My Life As a Torpedo Test Target

      —My Life As a Human Hockey Puck

      —My Life As an Afterthought Astronaut

      —My Life As Reindeer Road Kill

      —My Life As a Toasted Time Traveler

      —My Life As Polluted Pond Scum

      —My Life As a Bigfoot Breath Mint

      —My Life As a Blundering Ballerina

      —My Life As a Screaming Skydiver

      —My Life As a Human Hairball

      —My Life As a Walrus Whoopee Cushion

      —My Life As a Computer Cockroach (Mixed-Up Millennium Bug)

      —My Life As a Beat-Up Basketball Backboard

      —My Life As a Cowboy Cowpie

      —My Life As Invisible Intestines with Intense Indigestion

      —My Life As a Skysurfing Skateboarder

      —My Life As a Tarantula Toe Tickler

      Baseball for Breakfast (picture book)

      SECRET AGENT DINGLEDORF
      . . . and his trusty dog, SPLAT 02

      The Case of the Giggling Geeks

      The Case of the Chewable Worms

      The Case of the Flying Toenails

      The Case of the Drooling Dinosaurs

      The Case of the Hiccupping Ears

      Other Books by Bill Myers

      McGee and Me! (series)

      Bloodhound, Inc. (series)

      Forbidden Doors (series)

      The Bloodstone Chronicles (fantasy)

      www.Billmyers.com

      the incredible worlds of Wally McDoogle

      MY LiFe

      as

      Reindeer Road Kill

      B I L L    M Y E R S

      01

      MY LIFE AS REINDEER ROAD KILL

      Copyright © 1995 by Bill Myers.

      All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced in any form without the written permission of the publisher, with the exception of brief excerpts in reviews.

      Published in Nashville, Tennessee, by Thomas Nelson. Thomas Nelson is a registered trademark of Thomas Nelson, Inc.

      Thomas Nelson, Inc., titles may be purchased in bulk for educational, business, fund-raising, or sales promotional use. For information, please e-mail SpecialMarkets@ThomasNelson.com.

      Cover art by Jonathan Gregerson.

      Scripture quotations are from the International Children’s Bible®, New Century Version®, copyright © 1986, 1988, 1999 by Tommy Nelson®, a Division of Thomas Nelson, Inc.

      Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

      Myers, Bill, 1953–

          My life as reindeer road kill / Bill Myers.

              p. cm. — (The incredible worlds of Wally McDoogle ; bk. #9)

          Summary: Wally receives an invitation to the Lord’s birthday party on December 25 and bungles his way to understanding the best gift to give God.

          ISBN 978-0–8499–3866–5

          [1. Christmas—Fiction. 2. Christian life—Fiction.

      3. Humorous stories.] I. Title. II. Series: Myers, Bill, 1953– .

      Incredible worlds of Wally McDoogle ; #9.

      PZ7.M98234Myj    1995

      [Fic]—dc20                                                          95–23714

                                                                                          CIP

                                                                                            AC

      Printed in the United States of America

      08 09 10 11 12   QW   24 23 22 21 20

      For Traci and Randy—

      as you grow together in your love,

      and in God’s.

      I tell you the truth. Anything you did for any of my people here, you also did for me.

      —Matthew 25:40

      Contents

      1. Just for Starters...

      2. Another Sign

      3. A Plan of Action

      4. Shopping Spree

      5. Calling All Angels...

      6. A New Plan

      7. Helpful Hands

      8. Reindeer Bronco Busting

      9. Chaos Rains

      10. Wrapping Up

      Chapter 1

      Just for Starters . . .

      The nice thing about dreams is that you don’t have to take them seriously. It doesn’t matter what happens. You can fall off the Empire State Building. Or run too slow and become the grease spot on the wheels of a runaway freight train. Or explode from eating one too many peanut butter cups. What difference does it make? You always wake up safe and sound in the morning where the only real worry is who gets to use the bathroom next.

      At least that’s what I used to think. But not any more. . . .

      It all started innocently enough two nights before Christmas. I was dreaming about all the cool stuff I’d be getting. In the dream I was hanging out in some motorbike shop signing autographs for the latest movie I was starring in (okay, I like to dream big) and checking out all the jet-powered motorcycles Mom wanted to give me for Christmas (okay, I like to dream real big).

      Suddenly, this guy in a white tuxedo, top hat, and black cane appeared at the front of the line. Good day, Wallace, he said in a thick English accent.

      Who are you?

      Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Bartholomew. I am your guardian angel.

      That’s nice, I said, reaching for another one of my photos to sign for him. So tell me Bart, do I make this out to you, or to your boss?

      Before he could answer, the man behind him growled, Back of the line, punk. I looked up and saw the famous movie star Clint Westwood grabbing the guy by the shoulders. When it comes to getting Mr. McDoogle’s autograph, we don’t take kindly to cuts.

      That’s right, a woman’s voice agreed. It was Laura Lottalips, star of stage and screen. She was standing right behind Clint, batting her baby blues directly at me. We’ve waited over six hours to meet the marvelous Wally McDoogle. I’m afraid you’ll just have to wait your turn.

      The guy in the tux threw me a grin. I say, old boy, you certainly know how to dream, don’t you?

      I frowned. What?

      This is a dream, Wallace. Just another one of your crazy dreams.

      No way.

      Oh really? he asked, picking up a nearby pizza I’d been munching on. Since when do they make chocolate-covered pizzas?

      I took a look at the chocolate delight and answered, Since . . . since . . . He had a point. I couldn’t ever remember eating chocolate-covered pizza.

      Suddenly, Bartholomew snapped his fingers and everything froze—people’s conversations, Clint’s scornful scowl, Laura’s baby blue eyes. Everything.

      Hey . . . I nervously rose to my feet. How’d you do that?

      Like I said, old chap, this is merely a dream. In reality you’re still back home in bed imagining all of this.

      I looked at Clint, then Laura, then all the other superstars, models, and Olympic champions waiting in line for my

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