You South Africa

DIDN’T YOU HEAR WHAT I JUST SAID?

LEAD the conversation, stand out from the crowd, be heard.

It’s the golden rule for anyone who wants to get ahead in life so at work, home, on social media and at parties we all talk over each other. But we aren’t listening – and nobody is listening to us.

The result? It’s making us lonelier, more isolated and less tolerant than ever before. In short, we aren’t doing ourselves or anyone else any favours. In this extract from a fascinating new book, You’re Not Listening: What You’re Missing and Why It Matters, American writer Kate Murphy explains why it’s vital you stop talking and start listening.

WHEN was the last time you listened to someone? Really listened, without thinking about what you wanted to say next, glancing down at your phone or jumping in to offer your opinion?

And when was the last time someone really listened to you? Was so attentive to what you were saying and whose response was so spot-on that you felt truly understood?

In modern life, we’re encouraged to listen to our hearts, listen to our inner voices and listen

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