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America’s only UFO lobbyist searches for intelligent life in Washington, DC.

The morning after I contacted the Defense Department, I got a voice mail message. “Man, we were looking at your query from yesterday on the UFO stuff,” the public affairs officer said. He sounded as if he was trying not to laugh. “You’re killing us.”

He read aloud some of the questions I’d sent: “Which presidents have asked about UFOs? Does the president have the security clearance to know about UFOs? What happens if extraterrestrials show up?” He alternated between chuckles and exasperated sighs. “Which office handles UFOs? Dude, really? I don’t know how to—we

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